


As Long as You're with Me

by stateofhaiz



Category: Apple TV, Dickinson (TV), Ella Hunt - Fandom, Emily Dickinson - Fandom, Emisue - Fandom, Hailee steinfeld - Fandom, Sue Gilbert - Fandom
Genre: Apple TV - Freeform, F/F, LGBTQ Female Character, LGBTQ Themes, dickinson
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-03
Updated: 2020-12-04
Packaged: 2021-03-08 17:06:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 7,291
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27370180
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stateofhaiz/pseuds/stateofhaiz
Summary: This is a multi-chapter story based on Apple TV show "Dickinson". The story follows Emily Dickinson's love story with her best friend Sue Gilbert, starting from their first meet. Of course some things from the series have been changed. I hope you'll enjoy it and if you do, please comment any feedback. Good read!
Relationships: Emily Dickinson/Susan "Sue" Gilbert, emisue - Relationship
Kudos: 64





	1. Cold Meetings

It was October, the air was pretty cold and the sky suggested that surely soon it will rain.   
This won’t stop the Dickinson family to go visit the two orphans daughters of their family friends, the Gilbert’s, who recently died of typhus.   
Everyone was ready to go with their coats on, everyone except Emily who was still upstairs finishing to write one of her poems. The family was frustrated by her behavior. She didn’t even want to come at first, preferring her solo time with herself than being bored for half or an hour at some stranger’s home, in fact even if they were family friends Emily never met them ‘cause too occupied at writing poems in her room or enjoying the calm sitting under her favorite tree.   
Of course hearing the news of two people died leaving two young daughters alone made her sad – she’s more sensible than she actually shows- but still didn’t want to left her house.  
Was Mr. Dickinson to convince her, by promising that he would hire a maid if she would come. At that point Emily couldn’t say no, that always keep her away from her necessity to write poems and think.   
Mr. Dickinson opened the door to leave, tired of waiting for her daughter, when suddenly Emily went down the stairs and picked her red coat to wear it and went out with the family. Her father didn’t hide his weary and tired glance.

As previously anticipated by the dark grey color of the sky, it started to rain. Fortunately the family had just arrived. Meanwhile they walked closer to the porch of the house, Emily noted a presence staring at the window from the inside of the house. The image was confused thanks to the droplets of rain fallen on the glass of the window, but she knew that that would be probably one of the two daughters.That was in fact Sue the youngest of the two.   
She was sobbing before their arrive, she could feel the tears coming from the corners of her eyes, tears that she wiped so quickly with the sleeves of her black dress first to open the door and greeting her guests. She was alone at home in that moment, her sister Mary went out to the grocery.   
She didn’t have much to offer to their guests if not some cups of tea. Their visit was unexpected actually.   
The Dickinson’s thanked Sue for the tea and gave her condolences for her parents. Mr. Dickinson, who always had a gentle heart in these occasions, wanted to help Sue and her sister by paying the funerals himself.   
The Dickinson’s were one of the most important and richest family of Amherst so for them it wouldn’t be a problem. In the other side Sue’s family was poor. She accepted but only after offering them her help with chores as payment for the gentle act.

Emily observed Sue while she was talking with Mrs. Dickinson and Mr. Dickinson, and even if she was trying to avoid it, Emily could see the pain in her eyes and the sadness hidden in her gaze. She’s always been good at understanding people, even only looking at their faces.  
As soon as Mary arrived, it finally stopped to rain. Sue could finally take some fresh air, thing that she really needed in that moment. She left the Dickinson’s with her sister and went out to take a walk around the street of her house. After she left, Mr. Dickinson asked Emily to go make company to Sue in her walk. This time she wasn’t frustrated by the request of the father, she needed some fresh air too. She nodded and went out.   
After two minutes of walking she finally found Sue sitting on a bench. Walking towards her, she noticed the girl crying. She didn’t want to intrude on her in a moment so delicate like that, but at the same time she was feeling bad for her and she wanted to console her in some way. Emily was confused, she didn’t know what to do. They were strangers to each other after all.   
With all the courage she had, Emily decide to go towards her. Sue, noticing her presence walking near, quickly wiped her tears away, but her eyes stayed red. Emily sat down on the bench next to her.

-“Hey, you’re enjoying the fresh air?”- Emily said looking at Sue’s face.

-“Yeah, I like the smell of the air after it rained”- she said still looking at the ground.

-“Yes it’s really nice”- she said with a lovely glance

They stayed silence for 2 seconds or 4 but it seems an eternity for Emily, typically not so good at conversation.

-“I still didn’t introduce myself, I’m Emily, I wish we could met in better circumstances, I’m so sorry for what happened”- she was still looking at Sue’s face hoping that she would turn around making things less awkward.

“-Thank you”- Sue’s voice cracked a little –“I’m Sue”- another tear was going to fell from the corner of her eye, but this time she didn’t wipe it, letting it wet the gown of her dress. When she finally turned around and looked at Emily, she noticed the girl freezing, in fact she forget to take her coat first to go out, leaving it at Sue’s house.

-“You forget your coat inside”- she said while taking off hers –“Here, you’re freezing, take mine”-

Emily could not accept it, but her new friend insisted placing the coat on her shoulders herself. Emily smiled at Sue’s gest and the girl smiled back.

-“So you’re the famous Emily?!- Sue said

Emily smiled a little, -“What you mean with famous?”-

-“Well I always heard things about you from your father”-

-“I guess not good things”- she already knew what her father would say about her, he never liked her “scandalous behavior”, as he used to call it.

-“Mhhm well…”- They both laughed.

-“But I admire you, you know?”- Sue said.

-“You do? Why?”- Emily was surprised

-“You’re so carefree, and nothing can take you away from the things you love, you’re not afraid of anything”- 

-“Wow…”- she was even more surprised now. No one ever thought those things about her, all the other people thought she was insane for acting like that. She instantly recognize that Sue wasn’t like the others, Emily wasn’t a freak at her eyes. “But how she knew all those things anyway” she thought –“…and you figured out all these stuff by only hearing my dad talking?”- she laughed a little.

-“You’ll be surprised to know how much you can learn about people by only listen them talking”- They continued to look at each other while the conversation was getting deeper

-“Give me an example”- Emily said with a curious tone

-“Well I know you write”- Sue said

-“How do you know??!”- She said surprised, almost screaming. Emily was sure her father would never tell this to people not even by accident

-“Well usually people with this mannerism are artists, and then your hand is stained with ink”- she laughed

Emily looked at her hands, she didn’t even noticed that, and when she actually saw the ink stains she laughed too. The two had just met, but they could already feel a certain chemistry.  
They continued to talk, when suddenly they heard a voice calling for Emily. Was Lavinia’s voice that was telling her to reach the family to go back home.   
-“I had to go, I guess we’re going to see more often now, maybe tomorrow?”- Emily said smiling at Sue while standing up from the bench.

-“Yeah see you tomorrow, Emily”- Sue said smiling back.

Emily continued to smile for all the way home. She couldn’t stop thinking about what Sue said about her, she finally find someone who understands her truly in all her good intentions.


	2. The Coat

The next morning, after Emily got out of bed, she wasted no time taking off her nightgown and changing in her white dress, impatient for Sue’s arrive. While she was dressing she remembered the poem that she was writing the night before, still incomplete, so when she finished dressing she sat at her desk and continue to write. Her eyes shifted constantly from the paper to the window. Sue was supposed to arrive at any moment, and Emily wanted to greeting her first of the other family members, and most importantly first of Austin that always had a particular attraction for Sue.   
When she finally finished to write her poem and looked at the window, she saw Sue walking closer to her house with something in her hands that Emily couldn’t figure out what it was, but the color seemed familiar to her.   
Emily went down the stairs almost running and opened the door first than Sue could knock.

-“You didn’t even give me the time to knock”- Sue said laughing

-“I saw you coming from the window, I didn’t want to let you wait at cold”- Emily said with an embarrassed tone, stroking the back of her neck with her left hand.  
-“Come on, get inside”- Emily said, still breathless due to the previous run

-“I brought your coat, you forget it at my house yesterday”- 

Emily had completely forgot about her coat, and in that moment she remembered that she never returned Sue’s coat to her, so it should be somewhere in her room.

-“Thank you”- her voice became a little goofy-“I, I have yours in my room, come with me”-

Sue followed her friend up the stairs. When Emily opened the door and entered in her room, Sue stayed on the doorway, she preferred not to enter in such a private space of Em. Emily goes straight to her closet for searching the coat when she gives a fast look on her right where Sue was.

-“What are you doing there?! Come on get in!”- Emily said with a soft smile on her face. 

Sue entered and closed the door than she seated on Emily’s bed. She was quite nervous.   
While she was seating she noted a little scrap of paper on the desk next to her. 

-“You were writing?”- she said to Emily. The girl was still searching for the coat in her closet, thus giving the back to her friend. She turned around and looked at Sue with a curious soft smile.

-“How did you know this time?”-

-“Well was easier this time, you left your poem on the desk”- she laughed

-“Oh…” -she paused for a second- “…right”- she laughed too, then she finally found the coat.

-“Can I read it?”- Sue knew this was something special for Emily. No one has ever read one of her poems and no one of her poems ever left that room, and till that day no one ever took a real interest to read them. The thing Sue didn’t know was that Emily wrote that poem inspired by her and their meet. She thought a lot about Sue the night before, how they easily understand each other and at how she had to manage with so much grief, and somehow that poem was the product of all these thoughts.

-“You really wanna read it?”- she said with her typical smile while she was walking closer to her friend with the coat on her arm.

-“Yeah”- Sue said smiled her back. She didn’t care about the coat anymore.

Emily took the piece of paper and came back to Sue, seating next to her on her bed.

-“I actually finished to write it right when you arrived”- she said while she was giving the poem to her friend.

-“Nobody knows this little rose   
It might a pilgrim be   
Did I take it from the ways   
And lift it up to thee.   
Only a bee will miss it,   
Only a butterfly,   
Hastening from far journey   
On it’s breast to lie.   
Only a bird will wonder,   
Only a breeze will sigh   
Ah, Little Rose, how easy for such as thee to die”- 

Emily shivered while Sue was reading at loud, it made a certain effect to her and she couldn’t hide it. But Emily’s poem didn’t make a certain effect only on her.

-“Emily, this is so beautiful”- this was all Sue could say without crying, but the look on her face could literally say more. 

-“You’re all right?”- Emily said looking at Sue’s face. 

She was worried, maybe Sue figure out that the poem was for her, and that’s why she was closed to tears.

-“Yeah..."– her voice cracked a little-"... it’s just that you’re really good at this Em, I’m sorry that your father won’t let you publish your works”- She prefer not to tell her friend the real reason she was about to cry, she didn’t like showing her real feelings.

-“You really think that?”- Emily said while Sue was turning around for looking at her.

Emily’s eyes widened hearing that words from Sue, she knew she really meant that and at that her beautiful, soft smile came back.   
The atmosphere was every second more intense and intimate, the tension between the two builded up.

-“Yeah”- Sue’s voice was like melted, she couldn’t stop staring at Emily’s face.

Emily, from her side, never stopped looking at Sue’s beautiful and sweet face, ending up to staring back at her. She felt something in that moment, something like a pain in her stomach, but not a real pain, it was like if her gut was trying to tell her something.

Suddenly the door opened, and there was Austin.

-“Emily, mom needs you in the kitchen”- he said with authoritative tone. Emily gave him a bothered glance.

-“Oh Sue, you came! When did you arrive?”- his voice instantly became sweet

-“Not so long ago”- Sue answered

-“I’m very glad you’re here, I’ll wait for you downstairs”- Sue nodded and gets up from the bed walking up to the door, when Emily gets up too and took her hand.

-“Sue!”- she paused for a second -“Ahhm…You forget your coat”- it was like she was about to say something else, actually.

-“Oh yeah, thank you Emily”- Sue said with her tender, gentle voice, smiling again to her.

The feeling in Emily’s gut got louder.


	3. When The Party's Over

A month had passed, and on this month Sue went to the Dickinson’s house every day, as previously promised, and every day she could enjoyed the time with the person that was now her best friend, Emily. Of course she went there for helping the family in everything they needed, but even though all the weary chores, she was always happy to go because of Emily. She loved spend time with her friend, she felt comfortable and safe around her, like no matter what would have happen they had each other, and the exactly same was for Emily. She trusted her enough to let her read all of her poems, from the most deepest and “weird” to the ones with most general contents. All her thoughts were in these poems and only Sue was allowed to explore those. She was the first and only.

On a night in late November, the Dickinson’s wanted to have a party. They invited everyone: Mr. Dickinson’s friends, Lavinia and Austin’s friends, that were Emily’s friends too but not so close to her, and of course Sue and her sister, even if only Sue could make it. She didn’t want to come actually, cause she was still in mourning, but Emily wanted her there and she couldn’t say no, not to her.  
She went there early for helping, and when she arrived she found Mrs. Dickinson to greet her in.

-“Oh Sue I’m so happy you came!”- Mrs. Dickinson said with a tone of excitement -“And thank you for coming early we really needed some help in the kitchen”-

-“Thank you Mrs. Dickinson I’m happy to be here, where’s Emily?”- It was weird not seeing Emily. Usually is her the first one to greet her in the house, she thought.

-“She’s in the kitchen making some bread for tonight, I think it would be better for you to help her, who knows what mess she could do”- Emily have never been good at cooking

Sue hinted a smile and went to the kitchen, and the first thing she saw was Emily with her hair all covered in flour. She was definitely not good at cooking

-“Emily?! What happened here?!”- Sue said laughing, walking closer to her with a napkin to take away all the flour from Emily’s hair

-“Oh Sue! Thank God you’re here! I have no idea of what I’m doing”- she looked at Sue like she was her savior

-“Well I noticed”- she said making Emily laugh and then she took all the flour from her hair

-“Here, let me show you how to do it”- Sue has always been good at cooking and with all the housekeeper’s things too. She never had an easy life so she was forced to learn. 

Emily observed her with a look of adoration, that wasn’t the first time Sue saved her from doing a disaster.

-“Emily?!”- Sue said calling the friend who was like frozen

-“Yes!?”- Emily said gasping

-“You got lost in your thoughts?”- she asked curious with a little smile on her face, while she was working the dough. That was a thing Emily does sometimes

-“No, I was focus looking how you do this, you really know what you’re doing”- that was a lie, the first part, she didn’t mind of the bread, she was admiring Sue…

-“Oh that’s good cause it’s up to you now”- she said handing off the rolling pin to her. 

Emily was visibly panicked, she didn’t want to mess it up but it was actually what happened.  
Sue came behind her back to help her, guiding her arms and hands in the right movements. Emily felt again that something in her gut. She still couldn’t explain why of that persistent feeling, the only thing she knew was that it always happen when Sue is around her.

-“See? You’re doing great now!”- Sue said moving her eyes to look at Emily’s, still staying behind her with arms touching

-“Yeah!”- she sighed and then a big smile came across her face, making smile her eyes too. 

She turned her head around for looking at Sue. She froze, their eyes locked, and Emily could feel her heart beating faster and faster, and of course the feeling in her gut.  
They stared at each other for two seconds, maybe three, until Lavinia walked in the kitchen.  
The two immediately parted, acting like nothing happened, ignoring Vinnie’s suspicious look.

The guests had arrived, everything was ready, the food was appreciate by everyone, and even Emily received compliments for the bread. The party came really nice and Emily was happy and satisfied, but that happiness didn’t last long.  
While everyone was dancing, she was sat on a chair seeing Austin dancing with Sue.  
She was upset. Her brother always had tendency of making like a competition with her, for everything, and in this case he wanted to be the closer one with Sue, he was even attracted by her indeed. She hated it. For the first time that she felt good and understood by someone, her invidious, stupid brother had to ruin everything. Emily knew perhaps that Sue wasn’t interested in him, but seeing them dancing together made her sad and quite jealous. Deep down her wished to be at Austin place dancing with Sue. 

When the party was over and every guest was gone, the women of the house stayed up to clean and tidy up the house. Sue stayed too and when they finished it was already midnight.

-“Thank you for invited me, it was a really nice party”- Sue said taking her coat from the hanger for leaving

-“Sue!”- Emily took Sue’s arm-“You can’t go now, it’s dark outside and you’re alone. Why won’t you stay here tonight?” 

Sue was hesitant, she didn’t want to disturb.

-“Emily is right, it’s too late for you to go. You can sleep in our guest room”- Mrs. Dickinson said.

Sue accepted but made a strange look, almost scared, and Emily knew why.  
Since her parents death, Sue couldn’t sleep well without someone with her, in fact she had nightmares, so Emily offered her to sleep in her room. 

They slipped in their nightgowns ready to go to bed. Sue was already in bed while Emily took a blanket from her closet for sleep on the floor.

-“What are you doing with that blanket?! Come here we’ll sleep together”- Sue said moving on the left edge of the bed.

-“Oh don’t worry Sue I’m good here, and then the bed is narrow, we would sleep all tangled”-

-“I don’t mind it, come on get in!”- Emily joined Sue in the bed, and as previously anticipated by Emily, they fell asleep all tangled up.

While Emily was sleeping, unconsciously, she wrapped her arm around Sue’s waist hugging her, and when she woke, in early morning, she found it still there. She stared at it for a moment, or better, she stared at Sue. She felt something like rumbles and rumbles again. She needed to get up, and so she did, and went to sit on the chair of her desk. She felt inspired to write so she turned around to look at Sue for a second and then she took a piece of paper and a pencil from the drawer, paying attention to not make any sound.

While Emily was centered on her writing, she heard a little noise. She turned around looking at the bed and she saw Sue standing up.

-“Oh sorry Sue, did I wake you up?”- Emily said 

-“Oh, no it wasn’t you”- Sue said reassuring her friend

-“You had a nightmare?”- Emily said, and you can surely hear the tone of preoccupation in her words

-“No I’m fine really, I think I didn’t sleep so well from a long time. What are you doing there?”-

-“I’m writing, I had an inspiration when I woke up”- this was something she usually does too

Sue walked closer to her and sat on the desk to observe Emily.  
Most people could find weird waking up in early morning and feel the need to write, but not Sue. She found it attractive and admired and adored Emily for that, thing that her eyes couldn’t hide. She stared at Emily in fact and in the room there was a silence, a kind of silence that comes only when two people understand each other.

-“Nailed it!”- Emily said with a tone of excitement, when she saw Sue staring at her -“Sue?!”-

-“Uhm”- she gasped.

It seems like a replay of the episode in the kitchen of the day before, but this time the roles were inverted.

-“Sorry I got lost on my thoughts”- Sue said, but that was a lie

-“You know you could write your thoughts down, it helps a lot”-

-“Like you do with your poems? I don’t know if I could be good as you at it”- her tone was insecure

-“You have to try it at least once, I’m sure you’re gonna make it and I can always help you with it”-

-“Deal”- she sounded more confident now

They got interrupted by Mrs. Dickinson’s voice telling them to wake up from behind Emily’s room. The two were already up of course, so now they had to get dressed, but  
Emily was having problems with her corset.

-“Let me help you”- Sue said, and immediately Emily could felt Sue’s arms around her waist and then her delicate, soft hands slide on her back to arrange the wires.  
She felt again those rumbles, every single time louder and louder, but this time she couldn’t ignore it so she did what she had to do. She turned around to Sue and kissed her. She didn’t think at the consequences, she just did it.  
Sue was taken by surprise and parted her lips from Emily’s of an inch, but then after not more than a second, that seemed an eternity for Emily, Sue kissed her back holding her beautiful face with a hand.  
They shared a very intimate moment, magical, it felt so good so…..right...  
Emily’s rumbles had never been as loud as now, but she felt safe in Sue’s arms, the type of safe and comfort that you can only find in the person you love. She didn’t know how to explain this kind of affection for Sue, she felt confused by those feelings. She just knew she loved Sue with all her heart and soul, and she could bet now that her best friend felt the exactly same for her.


	4. Where Love First Began

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Who watched the haunting of bly manor will probably recognize the quote

Two days had passed since Emily and Sue shared that kiss together, and as many days had passed since the last time she saw Sue, in fact, after that day she never came back to the Dickinson’s.   
Mrs. Dickinson said that she was sick and she wouldn’t have shown for a couple of days. Emily wanted to believe that was the truth but… “What if she’s upset for what happened the other day?” she thought.   
She passed the days closed in her room, sometimes writing, sometimes just in her bed staring at the ceiling, upset cause her best friend, probably, didn’t want to see her anymore.   
“But why?”   
When Emily turned around and kissed Sue, she kissed her back…   
“So why she’s avoing her now?”   
“Maybe she regret it” she thought again, and for the first time from that moment even Emily was regretting it. If she wouldn’t turned around to kiss her, Sue would be with her now, probably reading and laughing as they always do when they’re together.

The days became three, four, five, until Emily decided to go at Sue’s house herself. She took her coat and went out. It was cold outside of course, it was early December after all, but even the sun was shining unexpectedly.   
When Emily arrived, she noticed someone on the bench near Sue’s house, the same bench where they officially met. She walked closer to it and recognized that someone. Was Sue. She was happy to see her and go talk to her, but at the same time she was scared about how Sue would react seeing her. But she had no choice she had to go to her, so she did.  
Sue recognize her friend while she was walking closer to her, and wanted to leave, she didn’t have the courage to face her after had avoid her for days, but she couldn’t run away forever.   
She turned around her head watching Emily sitting on the bench next to her.   
They stayed silent for a bit. Both of them didn’t know what to say, until Emily, with all the courage she had, started talking.

-“Sue I…”- but she was interrupt

-“I’m sorry Emily, I’m sorry for avoiding you in these days, I just didn’t know what to do if I had seen you”-

-“No Sue, I am sorry for the other day, I should never…”- she was interrupt again

-“No Emily, you see, it’s this the problem of the other day, the fact that I liked it”- she got nervous. She stood up and started pacing tensely, while Emily stayed sat on the bench.

-“You liked it?”- she asked with a surprise and sighed tone

-“Of course I did, Emily. I love you so much, you’re my best friend…”- Emily’s eyes became bright -“… and it’s this the problem, I don’t know how to feel it’s just that…”- she paused for moment and looked Emily in the eyes -“I realized that I love you Emily, I love you in the way I’m supposed to feel about some boy, and I don’t know if this is wrong but the only thing I know is that this feeling is real, you’re the only one who understands, without you I might as well not exist here”- tears starting falling from Sue’s eyes.  
Emily stood up and hugged her more tight than she could. She cupped her cheek and wiped Sue's tears away. Emily started tearing too. The two smiled to each other. Now Emily had to say something, but first she grabbed Sue’s hands and held them.

-“I love you too Sue, and I know you’re scared cause I am too, but the way I feel when I’m with you make me forget all the fears, and I know this can’t be a wrong feeling. And as scary as this is I don’t care, I’m ready to take the risk as long as you’re with me, only us will know it, and that’s enough for me… if that’s enough for you”- other tears fell from Sue’s eyes.   
Emily came closer, their bodies touching, hands still holding and then they slowly kissed. Emily left Sue’s hand and placed hers on her neck holding it. Sue did the same wrapping Emily’s waist for pulling her closer. They still had a hand holding the other, while the kiss deepened even more.   
They parted their lips of an inch and looked at each other, forehead to forehead, they could feel each other breath on their skin. A big sweet smile came across their faces. Emily placed a gentle kiss on Sue’s forehead.

-“Please don’t leave me again”- Emily said almost crying again

Sue looked into Emily’s gorgeous, hazel eyes and gave her a sweet, comforting smile.

-“I would never forgive myself if I’d do that again”-


	5. We Are the Only Poets and Everyone Else Is Prose

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm a huge fan of Taylor Swift and I wanted to use some lyrics from her songs for the fanfic

Everything was quite at the Dickinson’s house. Emily laid on her bed sick and ashed. She’s been on this state from 3 days now and for this Mr. Dickinson ordered everyone to stay silent.   
The doctor said she had a bad flue, but nothing that some rest, cure and attention couldn’t heal. Unfortunally though, the family should had go out of town in that day, but they couldn’t leave Emily alone in the house, not in these circumstances. 

Mr. Dickinson was about to cancel the trip when Sue arrived.   
Since Emily was sick, she went there earlier every morning and when she came back to her own house all she could think was Emily, scared about the possibility that her friend could get worse in her absence.   
She arrived at the perfect time.  
Mr. Dickinson asked her if she could take care of Emily while they were out of town, staying with her day and night.   
Sue of course accepted. She was so happy to spend all that time alone with her best friend, they had the whole house for themselves, and of course she could check Emily’s condition, preventing her concerns to come out.

The family went to wave off Emily, knowing to had left her in safe hands.   
Sue went upstairs and when she walked through the door of the bedroom, Emily’s face, as if it was magic, immediately brighten.

-“Sue!”- her voice didn’t cover the pain, but the happiness of seeing her friend neither.

Sue sat on the bed and with a gentle touch she cherished Emily’s face.

-”Oh Emily, how are you feeling?”- she said soft and worried

-“Like I was yesterday and the day before, my head headache is like… a thunder”- she said with a pain tone

-“Did you eat something?”- Sue said while taking a damp cloth and pressing it on Emily’s forehead

-“No”- she said almost whining

-“I’m gonna prepare you a chicken soup then, It’ll help you with the flue”- she putted the cloth in the bowl of water on the bedside table and continued to caress Emily’s cheek

-“My parents had left already?”-

-“Yes they left some minutes ago, I’ll stay here while they’re out of town”-

-“For real?!”- she said almost screaming for how exited she was. She could finally spend time alone with her best friend without the fear of someone interrupting them, and even if she was sick that wouldn’t stop her to enjoy at best her time with Sue. She was like a medicine for Emily.

-“We can read the book that dad bought me the other day, it…”- she went interrupted

-“Emily, we’ll read it when you’ll get better, I don’t want you to get worse…”- Sue said standing up and adjusting Emily’s blanket -“… you need to rest now, I’m in the kitchen preparing the soup, call me if you need anything”- and she placed a kiss on Emily’s forehead first to go downstairs.

Sue started cutting the vegetables for the soup, when suddenly she saw Emily all covered with her big blanket going downstairs.

-“Emily what are you doing here!? I told you to stay in bed or your flue will get worse!”- she said putting the knife down and going through her friend

-“I’m sorry Sue, I was bored doing nothing, can I stay here with you?”- 

Sue couldn’t resist to Emily’s soft look begging her to stay, so she allowed it to her, and let her sit on the chair in front of her workstation. They stayed silent for a bit while Emily observed Sue cooking.

-“So this is what is like?”- Emily said with a thoughtful tone

-“What?”- Sue asked

-“Living together…”- Sue stopped what she was doing and looked up to Emily with a soft and surprised glance -“… I mean you’re taking care of me like a wife would do for her husband”-

-“I guess so”- Sue said while coming back to work

-“Don’t you ever think about leaving everything in this town and go somewhere far away from here…”- Emily became deeper now, her look lost in her thoughts -“… make a new life in a new place where nobody knows you…”- she paused for a second and looked straight to Sue -“… living together… you and me… how it would be?”-

Sue came back to Emily, sitting on the table next to her.   
She wasn’t sure if it was the flue that made her say those things. It was a possibility, but she knew that her friend sometimes had thoughts like these.

-“I guess it would be wonderful doing all these things with you Emily…”- she said looking at Emily with her soft, heart eyes -“… but you know we can’t”- she continued with a sad tone

At that Emily could only sighed tiredly, thinking at the life she and Sue could have if only it was allowed by the patriarchy.   
She looked wretched. 

-“And you would be a terrible husband anyway”- Sue said with a playful tone, trying to play down the atmosphere

-“Hey!”- Emily said in sign of protest. The two started laughing

-“But I would love that…”- she reached over for Emily’s hand and held it, running up a finger on her knuckles -“… living with you”-

Emily became soft and a sigh escape from her throat, the type of sigh that naturally came when you look at the person you love.

-“Now come back to bed you need to rest, I’ll come to you when the soup is ready”- Sue said getting off the table and helping Emily to standing up

-“All right ma’am”- Emily said joking and making Sue smile

Emily was about to climb the first step of the stair when…

-“Oh I almost forgot…”- she said turning around and coming back to Sue -“… this is for you”- she took a scrap of paper from her pocket and handed it to her lover, then she went upstairs

Sue opened it and read what there was written…

-“We are the only poets and everyone else is prose”-

That was the first time Emily officially wrote something for her, it was explicit now. For Emily the only thing that really matters was Sue, the others faded into the background.   
It was like the rest of the world was black and white but they were in screaming color. 

Sue melted. She almost sobbed and first that Emily could finish the stairs…

-“Emily…”- the girl turned around and looked at Sue from the top of the stairs -“… I love you too”-


	6. The First Birthday Together

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 🌋

Two days had passed and Emily seems to feel so much better, her flu was gone and her head didn’t headache anymore. She was sure she had to thank Sue for this. She took care of her in every moment bringing her steaming soups every day, taking her company, and sleeping every night next to her. She didn’t care if she could contract the disease, she wanted to make feel all her love to Emily, even in this difficult moment.

In the next days, with the home still empty for the absence of the family, the two spent their time reading, cooking, (Sue cooked actually, Emily could only make mess around) making long walks in the orchard, taking care of the flowers in Emily’s greenhouse, and just enjoying each other’s company. All the things that a couple that lives together would do. Long nights reading poems in books under a big and comfy blanket that the two shared sitting on the couch near the fireplace. This is what happened on Emily’s birthday…

It would be a different birthday this year. Emily’s family, who should already been home, stayed stuck ‘cause of the huge snowfall of the past few days, so now she would celebrate without them. She didn’t mind it actually ‘cause she would celebrate the same with the person she loved the most, Sue. Even if it snowed in the last days, the two spent the evening reading under Emily’s favorite tree that now was covered of snowflakes. There was a certain peace in that wood. Emily held in her hands her book of novels, leading it a little on Sue’s side so she could read it too, while the girl was sitting next to her, lying her head on Emily’s shoulder. They came back home only after watching the sunset rise.

After dinner Emily went in the living room and sat on the couch near the fireplace, covert by her big blanket, while outside it began to snow. Sue came from behind the couch where Emily was and covert her eyes with both her hands.

-“Sue?! What are you doing?”- Emily said with a smile on her face

-“I got something for you, come with me”- 

Emily was surprised, she didn’t know what to expect. She stood up and with the eyes still covered, Sue guided her in the kitchen. 

-“You can open them now”- Sue said taking her hands away from Emily’s eyes, and when the girl opened them, she immediately saw a rice cake on the kitchen’s table, her favorite.

-“Sue!”- she said with a tone of excitement

-“You think I would have leave you without a cake on your birthday?!”- she said rhetorically

Emily kept smiling and hugged Sue for thanking her

-“And you remembered of my favorite cake”-

-”What kind of friend I would be If I would forget what likes the most to the love of my life?!”-

At that Emily’s smile became bigger, her eyes brightened. She leaned for kiss, her fingers running slowly on Sue’s neck. Sue caressed her cheek with a thumb and placed a kiss on Emily’s lips first of parting them.

-“Let’s go eat the cake now birthday girl”- 

After eating the cake, the two slipped in their nightgowns and sat on the couch all tangled one another under the blanket, just enjoying each other’s company near the fireplace. The window tarnished by the snow made the atmosphere more intense.  
Emily with her head lying on Sue’s shoulder and Sue with her arms wrapped around Emily, embracing her.

-“Thank you for today Sue… I wish we could stay like this forever”- Emily said with a sighed tone

-“Yeah…”- Sue said turning her head looking at Emily -“… but know that no matter how far we are, I will always love you Emily, more than anyone”- she hugged Emily the tighter and placed 3 kisses on her forehead. Emily, with her head still on Sue’s shoulder, looked her in the eyes…

-“You’re my favorite person in the world”- Emily said with a loving, intense look. She leaned forward and kissed Sue gently, passionately. Their lips collided, they seemed to be bound to each other. Sue took Emily’s hand and brought it on her chest, intertwining their fingers together. With the other hand Emily found her way under Sue’s nightgown. The kiss deepened and so their movements...

-“Emily…”- it seemed like she was about to ask her something

Emily knew what her friend was trying to say, what she wanted to do...  
She looked Sue in the eyes and nodded her consent.  
Sue kissed her again, smirking against her lips.  
Emily grabbed her waist.  
The two stood up and walked through the stairs while kissing passionately.  
Emily took Sue’s hand, guiding her to her bedroom.  
Sue shut the door and pull Emily against it. An arm around her waist and her lips touching Emily’s collarbone for kissing it. Sue felt shivers on Emily’s skin that encouraged her to move her kisses along her neck. Emily could only smirk.  
She knew what was going to happen.  
She sneaked her hands under Sue’s nightgown, hiking it up and off, revealing her body naked.  
The two looked for a moment in the eyes and smiled to each other.  
Emily throw herself on Sue’s arms and kissed her more passionately, more deeply. She pulled Sue on the bed and continued to kiss her. One hand intertwined with Sue’s moving up and down under the pillow, and the other caressing her hair.  
Sue sneaked her hand under the nightgown, running her fingers on Emily’s back.  
Emily raised up a little, Sue pulled even the other hand in, touching Emily’s hips and slowly took her vest off. 

They were both naked now, and first that Emily could leaning on Sue to kiss her again, she found herself pulled on the bed where Sue was first.  
They switched positions.  
Sue lined up her hips on Emily’s.The two looked at each other and shared a wide grin.  
Sue took Emily’s hand and guided it on her chest, between their bodies.  
Emily wrapped a leg around one of Sue’s while she was starting to kiss her completely.  
First the right side of her neck, then among Emily’s bare chest, heading down to her wet bellybutton, to end up on kissing the space between her thighs. Emily blushed. Chills crossed her spine who then expanded in all her body.  
That was her first time, for both actually. She was glad that it was with the person she loved, that it was with Sue.  
A gentle moan escaped from her throat. She held Sue’s hand tighter now, as her body heated more and more... Sue gave a look to Emily, her chin rested on a thigh. Emily looked back at her.  
She understood Sue’s intention and with a sweet smile she allowed her.  
Sue left Emily’s hand, running down where her tongue was before. Emily was arching off the bed. All she could do was letting out a chocked whine.  
Her goose bumps raised widely all over her skin. A certain calm stemmed from them.  
Her feet couldn’t move.  
Every forms of words and noises were caught in Emily’s throat.

Sue runned up her hand searching for Emily’s, and when she found and held it, she buried her head in Emily’s neck. Emily, still in unbelief for what just happened, could only gasp.  
Sue held Emily’s hand the tighter and brought it on her lips for kissing it. Emily pulled closer Sue’s face at hers and placed a kiss on her forehead first to leading it on her bare chest.  
They stayed like this for the entire night.


End file.
